May 4th, 2010

Hurray, it’s May! We are getting close to June—the month I believe you will be born. You are actually due July 7th but Jamie had Nolan and Preston each two weeks early so my guess is that you will follow suit!
We have had so much fun as a family getting everything ready for you. If you came into our home today you would absolutely think you were here already. All of your clothes have been washed and put away in your room (and this was no small feat as you have a million adorable outfits!). Your Dad deep cleaned all of the baby “stuff”—the swings, car seats, strollers, etc. for you too. Even the cupboard is full with clean bottles, just waiting for you to need them.
Your big sister is SO excited for you—I know I say that in every note to you but, really, I just can’t say it enough. Her anticipation for you is just the sweetest thing! She talks about you nonstop and happily shares all of her stuffed animals and favorite blankets with you by placing them in your room to wait for you. She has been practicing reading for you, too. She can’t wait to read to you just as soon as you get home. She has gotten all of her favorite “Baby Einstein” movies out from when she was little and is now watching them just to prepare for you. (She is trying to remember all of her baby signs!) She is always telling me that she will wake up at night to feed you or change your diaper if I need the help. I’m sure she really would if I asked! Too bad she is only three!!!
It is amazing how much love you have for your child. I love Grace so very much and wonder, like I’m sure all moms do at this point, how I could possibly love another child as much as I love her. Everyone says that your heart just doubles. I’m sure that will be the case. I already love you, my dear, more than words could every adequately express.
I am so, so, so, so, so, so glad that we never gave up on having you! Thank you God for all of the strength it took to make the dream of our family a reality!!!
Oh, and on the “family dream” note… About a year and a half ago I had a very real dream that we adopted a little boy from Ethiopia and named him Eli. When we almost adopted from Ethiopia, it was because of this dream. Anyway, I feel so strongly that this was more than a dream and that our little Eli is still out there waiting for us to find him. It’s funny because I now feel so content with our family of four (and you aren’t even here yet!). That being said, I still feel so bizarrely as though I have glimpsed into our future and this little boy is still a part of it. Anyway, I’ve shared this story time and time again so all of our closest friends and family know about “little Eli.” The reason I’m mentioning this is, about a month ago our close friend Katie called to tell us that she was reading a book named “The Baby Name Wizard.” In that book you can look up your existing child’s name and see a few suggested sibling names. Anyway, Katie looked up Gracie (the name we most often call Grace) and in it you will NEVER believe what it says! Gracie’s sister name is Lilly and her brother name is Eli!!!! Amazing! I’m 99.99%  certain that Lilly was even spelled with two ll’s. Crazy! Especially since we never even knew of this book until just the other day, well after we’ve told the world about Eli and hung the letters to your name  on your nursery wall! Right now, all we can think about it is YOU though. I’m sure you will keep us busy enough for the near future! I just wanted to tell you this story, just in case my dream ever comes to fruition!
I do have more to updates for you, but my hand is sore and I am sooo tired. I’ll fill you in on everything else soon…
I love you my baby!!!
Xoxoxoxoxoxo,
 
Mom

April 30th, 2010

Hi my beautiful baby girl. It has been sooo long since I have written to you. I keep waiting to have lots of time to write, and the moment just hasn’t presented itself. So, I guess I will just have to write what I can, when I am able.

The reason I wanted lots of time to write is because I have lots to tell you. Let’s just say we came to a pretty big “hurdle” about three weeks ago. The pre-birth order for maternity and paternity that our attorney sent to the judge was denied. Apparently, since it is still so rare to have someone else carry your biological child, our county doesn’t feel comfortable granting a pre-birth order the way it is done in most other counties in the nation. The way it was supposed to go per our infertility clinic and our highly specialized attorney, we would have the pre-birth document approved by the courts and placed in Jamie’s ob file so that when you are born you are immediately recognized as our biological child—end of story.

To process the pre-birth order we had legal documents all notarized by Jamie and Jamie, our infertility doctor, and your father and me stating that from conception you were our biological child and that we all agreed that you would immediately be recognized as our biological child upon your birth. Our attorney, who was referred to us by our infertility doctor as the #1 attorney in the state who specializes in surrogacy law, has processed around 10 of these pre-birth orders over this past year with no problems at all in other Michigan counties. We were the lucky ones to run into this issue for the very first time and without any warning. SO, it has thrown all of us for a HUGE loop (to say the very least).

The only “solution” to this legal nightmare is to “adopt” you, our biological child. Ridiculous, isn’t it?!? I’m sure some day this will just be a funny story for you to tell your friends, but right now, let me tell you, it is anything but funny…

I am so very glad that I have been journaling your entire journey to our family for you so that you will never for a second question whether you are really our biological child because of this “adoption.” Please know that this was just one random hoop that we had to jump through in this long process, and please know that we have always known, from day one, that we would do anything for you. You have always been our child. Ever since the day one year ago that we created you as our little embryo. If you ever read this and want more proof that you are biologically ours, just pull out your photo book and look at that precious photo of you as our little embryo! In that photo journal you will see that we were with you every step of the way as you made your way into the world and into our hearts and family.

Your Dad and I have been very busy doing all of the required adoption home study stuff that is now required of us. We only had 10 weeks left in Jamie’s pregnancy when we found out that we would need to file for adoption, and since Jamie had each of her own children around two weeks early, we may even have less time to pull this off. (Hence my lack of time to write in here over the past few weeks!)

The amount of time it takes most couples to do what we have done in one week is about 4 months! Amazing, huh?!? We have been busy filling out all of the applications, each writing our autobiography, filling out our budget, getting copies of our birth certificates, marriage license, driving records, local police background checks, federal background checks, getting fingerprinted, getting full physicals with TB tests, getting references from friends, family, neighbors, Grace’s teachers, and co-workers and much, much more! It has been just nuts. We know that you are SO worth it all!!! We met with our case worker at our adoption agency last night for three hours, and she was just great. We loved her! She knows and understands our full story and wants nothing more than to help us cut through this red tape as quickly and efficiently as possible.

This whole process has actually been wonderful for your Dad and me. It is really nice to tell someone about our lives and why we know we make a great team and will be wonderful parents to you. This whole infertility chapter has brought your Dad and me so much closer. We are both just bursting with excitement now over you!

That’s your update for now, peanut. I love you!!!

Mom