The reason I wanted lots of time to write is because I have lots to tell you. Let’s just say we came to a pretty big “hurdle” about three weeks ago. The pre-birth order for maternity and paternity that our attorney sent to the judge was denied. Apparently, since it is still so rare to have someone else carry your biological child, our county doesn’t feel comfortable granting a pre-birth order the way it is done in most other counties in the nation. The way it was supposed to go per our infertility clinic and our highly specialized attorney, we would have the pre-birth document approved by the courts and placed in Jamie’s ob file so that when you are born you are immediately recognized as our biological child—end of story.
To process the pre-birth order we had legal documents all notarized by Jamie and Jamie, our infertility doctor, and your father and me stating that from conception you were our biological child and that we all agreed that you would immediately be recognized as our biological child upon your birth. Our attorney, who was referred to us by our infertility doctor as the #1 attorney in the state who specializes in surrogacy law, has processed around 10 of these pre-birth orders over this past year with no problems at all in other Michigan counties. We were the lucky ones to run into this issue for the very first time and without any warning. SO, it has thrown all of us for a HUGE loop (to say the very least).
The only “solution” to this legal nightmare is to “adopt” you, our biological child. Ridiculous, isn’t it?!? I’m sure some day this will just be a funny story for you to tell your friends, but right now, let me tell you, it is anything but funny…
I am so very glad that I have been journaling your entire journey to our family for you so that you will never for a second question whether you are really our biological child because of this “adoption.” Please know that this was just one random hoop that we had to jump through in this long process, and please know that we have always known, from day one, that we would do anything for you. You have always been our child. Ever since the day one year ago that we created you as our little embryo. If you ever read this and want more proof that you are biologically ours, just pull out your photo book and look at that precious photo of you as our little embryo! In that photo journal you will see that we were with you every step of the way as you made your way into the world and into our hearts and family.
Your Dad and I have been very busy doing all of the required adoption home study stuff that is now required of us. We only had 10 weeks left in Jamie’s pregnancy when we found out that we would need to file for adoption, and since Jamie had each of her own children around two weeks early, we may even have less time to pull this off. (Hence my lack of time to write in here over the past few weeks!)
The amount of time it takes most couples to do what we have done in one week is about 4 months! Amazing, huh?!? We have been busy filling out all of the applications, each writing our autobiography, filling out our budget, getting copies of our birth certificates, marriage license, driving records, local police background checks, federal background checks, getting fingerprinted, getting full physicals with TB tests, getting references from friends, family, neighbors, Grace’s teachers, and co-workers and much, much more! It has been just nuts. We know that you are SO worth it all!!! We met with our case worker at our adoption agency last night for three hours, and she was just great. We loved her! She knows and understands our full story and wants nothing more than to help us cut through this red tape as quickly and efficiently as possible.
This whole process has actually been wonderful for your Dad and me. It is really nice to tell someone about our lives and why we know we make a great team and will be wonderful parents to you. This whole infertility chapter has brought your Dad and me so much closer. We are both just bursting with excitement now over you!
That’s your update for now, peanut. I love you!!!
Mom
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